Tuesday, 12 March 2019

Mentor and mentoring skills

The notion of mentoring is ancient. 

In Greek mythology the original Mentor was described by Homer as the "wise and trusted counselor" whom Odysseus gave in charge of his son Telemachus and his palace when Odysseus left for Trojan war. 
In academics, mentor is  synonymous with faculty adviser; a wise trusted advisor, guide,expert, healthy critique and friend. Mentoring is not merely advising , it embodies sound personal as well as professional relationship.

A mentor is someone who takes a special interest in helping another person develop into a successful professional.
A good mentor seeks to help a student optimize an educational experience, to assist the student's socialization into a disciplinary culture, and to help the student find suitable employment. 
These obligations can extend well beyond formal schooling and continue into or through the student's career.
Mentors are advisors, people with career experience willing to share their knowledge;  supporters, people who give emotional and moral encouragement; tutors, people who give specific feedback on one's performance; role models etc.

There is no single formula for good mentoring; mentoring styles and activities are as varied as human relationships. Different students will require different amounts and kinds of attention, advice, information, and encouragement. Some students will feel comfortable approaching their mentors; others will be shy, intimidated, or reluctant to seek help. A good mentor is approachable and available.

In long-term relationships, friendships form naturally; students can gradually become colleagues. 

At the same time, strive as a mentor to be aware of the distinction between friendship and favoritism.

An effective mentoring relationship is characterized by mutual respect, trust, understanding, and empathy. 

Good mentors are able to share life experiences and wisdom, as well as technical expertise. 

They are good listeners, good observers, and good problem-solvers. 

They make an effort to know, accept, and respect the goals and interests of a student.

Listen patiently
Build healthy  relationship
Nurture self sufficiency


Core Mentoring Skills

Both mentors and mentees should utilize the following core skills in their mentoring partnerships. 

1. Listening Actively : Giving an empathetic ear
     Active listening is the most basic mentoring skill; the other skills build on and require it. 

When you listen well, you demonstrate to your mentors and mentees that their concerns have been heard and understood. As a result, they feel accepted by you, and trust builds. 
• use appropriate nonverbal language such as looking directly into people’s eyes, nodding your head, leaning slightly toward them, frowning, or smiling where appropriate; 
• avoid interrupting mentors and mentees while they’re talking; 
• remember and show interest in things they’ve said in the past 
• summarize the key elements of what each of you said

2. Building Trust
   
 To become trustable, you must: 

• keep confidences shared by your mentors and mentees; 

• spend appropriate time together; 

• follow through on your promises to them; 

• respect your mentors’ and mentees’ boundaries; 

• admit your errors and take responsibility for correcting them; and 

• tactfully tell your partners if and why you disagree or are dissatisfied with something so they’ll know you’re honest with them.

3. Encouraging

The most valued mentoring skill is giving encouragement. 

This includes giving your mentoring partners recognition and sincere positive verbal feedback.

 Effective mentors encourage their mentees, which in turn helps increase the mentees’ confidence and enables them to develop.

Successful mentees make a point of positively reinforcing their mentors, which serves to keep the mentors focused and motivated. Provide genuine, positive feedback to your mentors and mentees on a regular basis.

You can:

 • compliment your mentoring partners on accomplishments and actions; 

• point out positive traits (such as perseverance and integrity) in addition to their performance and accomplishments; 

• praise them privately, one-on-one; 

• commend them in front of other people (being sensitive to any cultural and style preferences regarding public praise); 

• express thanks and appreciation; 

• write encouraging memos or e-mail and leave complimentary voice mail

Be certain that your praise and encouragement are sincere. 

 4. Identifying Goals and Current Reality

Whether you’re a mentor or mentee, you should have a personal vision, specific goals, and a good grasp of current reality.

 As a mentor, be clear on and talk to your mentees about their visions, dreams, and career/life goals. They’ll be interested in your current reality (your view of your strengths and limitations as well as the current reality of situations within your organization) and want help recognizing theirs as well. 

Critical Skills for Mentors 

In addition to the core mentoring skills described above, mentors use several specific competencies in an attempt to help mentees develop.

1. Instructing/Developing Capabilities

 All mentors do some teaching or instructing as part of their mentoring. 

The skill is especially important in formal mentoring. 

This seldom means that you’ll give formal speeches and lectures.

The mentor will

• be a “learning broker” as you assist your mentees in finding resources such as people, books, software, websites, and other information sources.

• teach your mentees new knowledge, skills, and attitudes by explaining, giving effective examples, and asking thought-provoking questions; 

• help your mentees gain broader perspectives of their organizations including history, values, culture, and politics; 

• demonstrate or model effective behaviors, pointing out what you’re trying to do; and 

• help them monitor performance and refocus steps as needed.

2. Inspiring 

One skill that separates superb mentors from very good ones is an ability to inspire their mentees to greatness. 

By setting an example yourself and helping your mentees experience other inspirational people and situations, you can help them on to future paths that excite and motivate even beyond their original dreams. 

• do inspiring actions yourself which challenge your mentees to improve; 

• help them observe others who are inspiring; 

• arrange other inspirational experiences for them; 

• challenge them to rise above the mundane and do important things in life.

• help them recognize inspiring actions they took in the past and ways to excel again.

3. Providing Corrective Feedback.

When you observe your mentees making mistakes or performing in less than desirable ways, you should be direct with your mentees, letting them know what you perceive and providing some better ways for handling the situations. 

It will probably be better for them to hear it from you than from others. 

This is an aspect of the mentor’s protection skill, managing risks

 Attempt to: 

• use positive, non-derogatory, business-like words and tone of voice with mentees when their behaviors or products aren’t satisfactory.

• give corrective feedback in private.

• give the feedback as soon as feasible after the performance.

• offer useful suggestions for them to try next time.

4. Managing Risks

 One of your tasks is to prevent your mentees from making unnecessary mistakes as they learn to take appropriate risks.

 As a mentor you will

• help your mentees recognize the risks involved in actions and projects, including some risks (and mistakes) you’ve experienced; 

• make suggestions to help them avoid major mistakes (business, career, financial, personal, and other) in judgment or action; 

• help them learn to prepare well, get wise counsel, then trust their own decisions and actions.

5. Opening Doors 

Mentors are usually in a position to provide visibility for their mentees. 

This means opening the right doors that allow them to meet people and to demonstrate to different audiences what they can do. 

 To open doors, you’ll: 

• put in a good word to people who could help your mentees reach desired goals; 

• personally introduce your mentees to appropriate contacts; 

• make certain your mentees’ abilities are noticed by others; 

• give your mentees assignments or opportunities that enable them to interact with important colleagues, suppliers, or customers.

Critical Skills for Mentees 

In addition to the core skills described earlier, mentees need to be competent in several areas

1. Acquiring Mentors

 In the spirit of career self-reliance, you should be very active in selecting and negotiating with several mentors who can help you succeed.

Be able to: 

• identify a desirable pool of individuals who potentially can provide you with mentoring.

• actively search for several mentors.

• convey your specific needs and goals to prospective mentors.

2. Learning Quickly

Mentors enjoy working with mentees who learn quickly and take seriously any efforts to teach them.

Try to: 

• apply the knowledge and skills presented to you, and be ready to tell your mentors how you applied them.

• observe carefully and learn indirectly from the modeled actions of your mentors and others; 

• study materials (those given by your mentors and materials you seek out) related to your development areas. 

• integrate new things you learn into your own conceptual framework for problem solving.

• receive feedback non defensively. (You should ask for specifics and be appreciative of the feedback. If your mentors have misperceived a fact, diplomatically tell them.)

3. Showing Initiative

 The mentors expect mentees to show the right amount of initiative.

 As an effective mentee, you: 

• know when and when not to show initiative.

• ask appropriate questions to clarify and get more information. 

• pursue useful resources on your own.

• take informed risks (stretch beyond your usual comfort level) in order to acquire new knowledge, skills, and attitudes.

• go beyond what your mentors suggest; that is, take their ideas and show creative or ambitious ways of using them.

4. Following Through 

Mentees who don’t follow through on tasks and commitments are often dropped and replaced with mentees who do. 

To demonstrate this skill: 

• keep all agreements made with your mentors; 

• complete agreed-upon tasks on time; 

• try out their suggestions and report back the results; 

• explain in advance if you want to change or break an agreement; and 

• persist with difficult tasks even when you’re discouraged.

5. Managing the Relationship

• stay up to date with each of your mentors on issues between you, goals to reach, satisfaction with your meeting schedules, etc.

• analyze the current status of your mentoring partnerships, and determine where to go next with them.

• prepare for the end of your mentoring relationships.

• leave the formal relationships on amicable terms, even if the relationships continue on an informal basis.






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